The Dragon Slayer's Guide to Life

Can Setting Goals Hurt You?

Why setting goals can backfire - The Boston Globe

Here is an excerpt:

It is a given in American life that goals are inseparable from accomplishment. President Kennedy's 1961 promise to put an American on the moon by the end of the decade is held up as an example of a world-changing goal, the kind of inspirational beacon needed to surmount immense societal challenges. Among psychologists, the link between setting goals and achievement is one of the clearest there is, with studies on everyone from woodworkers to CEOs showing that we concentrate better, work longer, and do more if we set specific, measurable goals for ourselves. Goal-setting is one of the seven habits of highly effective people, says self-help guru Stephen Covey, and even Henry David Thoreau, the philosopher of dropping out, celebrates the work of goal setting. "If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them," he writes in Walden.

But a few management scholars are now looking deeper into the effects of goals, and finding that goals have a dangerous side. Individuals, governments, and companies like GM show ample ability to hurt themselves by setting and blindly following goals, even those that seem to make sense at the time. These skeptics draw on a broad array of large-scale failures - the design of the Ford Pinto, the Enron collapse, the rash lending practices of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac - as evidence of the pernicious effects of goals. Outside the workplace, these thinkers point to the unintended consequences of high-stakes testing in grade schools, and psychological literature showing that goals and other incentives can constrict our thinking. Even the scarcity of cabs on rainy days, some argue, illustrates the ways that goals can blind people to their own best interests.

The argument is not that goal setting doesn't work - it does, just not always in the way we intend. "It can focus attention too much, or on the wrong things; it can lead to crazy behaviors to get people to achieve them," says Adam Galinsky, a professor at Northwestern University's Kellogg School of Management, and coauthor of "Goals Gone Wild," a paper in the current issue of a leading management journal.

"Goal setting has been treated like an over-the-counter medication when it should really be treated with more care, as a prescription-strength medication," he says.

full article

Becoming More Disciplined

"I need to become more disciplined."

This is a common problem for many, particularly creative and entrepreneurial individuals. Many people believe if they were simply more disciplined they would have caught up on their taxes by now, have a clean home, a profitable, well-managed business and, most importantly, the peace of mind they imagine will come with all these achievements. The problem is that setting a goal of being more disciplined is a difficult one to get enthusiastic about. In fact, for some it may take the creative wind right out of their sails. For people who create by breaking rules and challenging conventions, trying to maintain a commitment to become a better rule follower and schedule minder often ends up as a series of false starts, frustration, self-loathing and Ben and Jerry's binges.

Successful People Embrace Pain as a Learning Tool

This was sent to me by a coaching client as she was reflecting on a recent session. I am reprinting it here with her permission. I thought she had some very interesting thoughts here, particularly the point on embracing pain. I don't know that people often associate pain with success and yet it is part of the human condition and it is my strong belief that how a person relates to pain may have a lot more to say about their ultimate success than how they deal with good times.

My client's thoughts:

To me there are a least two different types of successful people.

Type A:

1. Have the material items to show the world. Flaunt it if you may.

2. Powerful - in an aggressive way. (look out world here I am attitude.)

Is All Your Planning Really Self-Sabotage?

Do you really mean it this time? Are you going to get control of your life once and for all?

Before you go diving in to Getting Things Done or some other fail-safe system to organize your life you may want to check out Andy Wibbel's post, Planning is Not a Substitute for Progress. When I first read it I had to laugh because I was JUST laying out my BIG pad of paper, the one for my serious strategizing. Yeah, I'm old school. I like pencils and markers and graph paper. Even pencils you have to sharpen. Just like the smell of it all.

If you are like me, (and who wouldn't want to be,really?) it may be that just planning things gets you high.  Or maybe it's the Sharpie ink.  Don't you miss mimeographs? (43 years old, if you are wondering. I remember punch cards, too.) Or if you are ultra hip, maybe you are addicted to new technology and can't resist checking out new software.

Feed your addiction if you must, but don't be fooled. Planning is not progress. In fact, planning is a favorite self-sabotage technique of many a would-be successfully self-employed person.  Truly, if I hear about one more pretty Mind Map I think I'll leap off my roof. 

Key Distinction: There is a difference between ACTIVITY and ACTION.

Bored? Unfulfilled? Running Experiments Can Supercharge Your Life

Courage is not the absence of fear, but the judgement that there is something more important than fear. Ambrose Redman

If you have been feeling your life is a bit anemic and want to give yourself a major energy transfusion, Steve Pavlina has a great post entitled Personal Growth on Steroids: The Strategy of Immersion. Between Bear Bombing and Fear Blasting, I am increasingly intrigued by Steve's take on things.

Here's the article intro:

What's My Motivation? Designing Goal Setting Experiments for a Fulfilling Life

I read Buckminster Fuller's Universe by Lloyd Steven Sieden at the recommendation of a client and was so struck by a passage in the preface that I wanted to share it with you.

"Fuller became so adamant about the contribution he could make that in 1927 he actually created an experiment using himself as "Guinea Pig B" (for "Bucky"). The specific purpose of this experiment was to determine and document what one individual could accomplish on behalf of all humanity which could not be achieved by any organization, government or business, regardless of its size or power. That experiment remained a critical element of Fuller's daily life until his death fifty-six years later.

So many of our goals have to do with our external life. We want more money, more time, more energy, more happiness, a better job and to get our bodies in shape. Often these goals have to do with a sense